A wedding planner is often a resource for all kinds of questions, and here was an interesting one that I received recently from a bride:
I am getting very excited about the prospect of asking my bridesmaids. I reached out to my male cousin whose girlfriend I have really gotten close to (they live together and have been dating for 3 years) and asked his thoughts on her being a bridesmaid. He took awhile to reply and said let me think about it. He obviously did not get back to me and I assume it was his way of saying “she may not be the one” or “i dont want to make this decision right now”. I really like her and would love to include her in some way. Do I see if he does follow up? is there a nice role that we could wait on to give her? i would love her to be a bridesmaid but family comes first…and he obviously needs to figure out whether his future is with her or not…any thoughts and guidance would be appreciated.
What would you suggest? Here was my response:
From what you have written, it doesn’t sound like your cousin is ready to have his girlfriend in your wedding. So even if you had another honor for her (she could do a reading in the ceremony, hand out programs, or a number of things we could talk about), how will you include her if she and your cousin aren’t together? My suggestion at this point would be to do nothing. Your wedding is a year away, and obviously a lot can happen between now and then. We can find something special for her later if you still want to…
photo courtesy of Alyssa Andrew-Swift