As a Philadelphia wedding planner, I want to share my take on serving food to wedding professionals on the wedding day. I am prompted to write this by a recent event.

The wedding band was from out of town. The week prior to the wedding, they emailed the Catering Manager, who forwarded the following email to me:

The bandleader emailed me Saturday and said that, “the bride & groom confirmed our band could enjoy cocktail hour.”  I said no, not allowed.  The bandleader thought I was crazy and said that’s abnormal.  I said no, not allowed.

When I work a wedding, the wedding professionals are ALWAYS given a meal. They don’t have to have the same food as the guests but they need to be served. They work long and hard (set up and working and taking down) and need the both a break and the food. PLEASE. It is human nature for the vendors to see an elaborate party and it doesn’t feel good if they are not taken care of in a simple way. When I was an intern at the beginning of my career, I worked a 14-hour day and wasn’t even offered a glass of water. I promised myself then that it would never happen again under my watch!  I feel strongly about this. We don’t need to have the same meal as the guests, although it is lovely when it happens. But we need to eat something. It is a kindness and absolutely appreciated by the wedding professionals.

The band had sent an email saying, “I did not mean the bar, just the possibility that some may grab a snack at cocktail hour.  We’ve never prevented our talent from doing this before, but I don’t foresee the entire band partaking in any food. I hope this would not necessitate an increase to the host’s package.”

 NO! We are not guests. We are working. End of story. At least as far as I am concerned. And this is why I will be talking to you about “vendor meals.”